What you need to be telling yourself.
It's easy to lose sight of this. But when we remind ourselves of the truth, we are better for it.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: feelings are fickle things. And today, I’m going to take it a step further by giving you some practical advice on what to do when you’re struggling with fickle feelings.
If there’s anyone who struggles with feelings, it’s me. I feel deeply. I’m an emotional guy. So one of my lifelong battles has been to not be ruled by my feelings. Feelings can be good, don’t get me wrong. But as a society we treat them as king. If we “feel” a certain way, we tell ourselves, then that MUST be true.
Newsflash: It’s not.
Now, those feelings can tell us a lot. They are great pieces of evidence, either about what’s going on around us or inside us. We need to be curious about our feelings, then. Dr. Alison Cook has taught me that. My therapist has taught me that. And it’s been life-changing.
But can I be honest? Sometimes we need to tell our feelings where to stick it. That’s the nice way to say it.
If you’re married, you know this is true. You’ve seen it play out. For example, my wife can say something, and I can “feel” like she’s slighted me and pout about it. And when she asks me about it and says, “I’m so sorry, that’s not how I meant that at all, here’s what I meant instead,” I then have to tell my hurt feelings to give way to the truth. That’s a simple way to put it, but I think it’s something many of us can relate to.
Right?
I was reminded of all of this while reading Psalms this morning. There’s a specific Psalm that makes this clear. I mean crystal clear. And it’s important not only that the Psalm says it, but how the Psalm says it. Because it’s pretty darn neat.
Here’s the really important Psalm followed by the neat lesson:
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