Are you caught in the mommy wine trap?

Here's how to get out of it.

"Mommy needs a drink."

It's become an all too popular refrain. Go to any Home Goods store or flea market, and you'll find the signs, hand towels, and artwork that declares that not only do moms need a drink, but they deserve a drink. That's the trap that Jenn fell into as she was raising her children. And today, she's doing all she can to expose the dangers and lies of mommy wine culture.

In this important episode of Confessions of a Christian Alcoholic, I sit down with my friend Jenn Kautsch, founder of the popular Sober Sis community. We unpack the subtle but destructive influence of "mommy wine culture," what it means to be a gray area drinker, and how Jenn’s life began to unravel—quietly and internally—even while she was doing all the “right” things as a church-going, high-performing mom. In fact, she had even served on staff of the Christian organization Cru (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ).

Jenn shares her story with honesty and grace, from her first glass of white zin to what she calls the “bottle breakdown.” We talk about how she went from hiding her anxiety and drinking behind a well-curated Christian life to becoming a leader and voice of freedom for thousands of women. Her insights into perfectionism, identity, and internal family systems (IFS) therapy are incredibly powerful.

We explore:

• The rise and lies of mommy wine culture

• Jenn’s hair (😂)

• The trap of being a “high-functioning” drinker

• How gray area drinking can differ from the traditional understanding of alcoholism

• Why slipping doesn’t mean sliding

• What it looks like to live with a divided mind—and how to begin healing

• How Sober Sis is creating a shame-free space for sober-minded women

Whether you’re curious about your own relationship with alcohol, navigating shame, or just trying to live more whole and present, this conversation will speak to you. Jenn’s wisdom, warmth, and humor make this such a fun episode.

Apple:

Spotify:

About this week’s guest: Jenn Kautsch

Jenn Kautsch is the founder and creator of Sober Sis, a faith-inspired community and coaching program for women navigating gray area drinking. As a self-described high-functioning mom who slowly found herself using alcohol as a way to unwind, Jenn got curious about her drinking, chose a different path, and now leads thousands of women on their own journeys to sober-minded living. With a heart for authenticity and freedom, Jenn brings warmth, wisdom, and practical tools to every conversation she enters—online or off.

• Instagram: Sober Sis

• Website: sobersis.com

Key moments

• 01:26 – What is "mommy wine culture" and why it’s so dangerous

• 08:09 – Jenn’s background as a rule-following Christian woman

• 13:26 – Her first drink and how subtle drinking took root

• 19:24 – The mental tug-of-war and cognitive dissonance

• 25:08 – Hiding in plain sight while doing “all the right things”

• 29:38 – The midlife identity crisis and reimagining life at 50

• 42:55 – Her six-week challenge that changed everything

• 51:30 – What makes the Sober Sis community so unique

• 56:10 – How addiction, the brain, and spiritual healing intersect

Video version

Watch the video version of Episode 4 below:

Quotes:

• “I was pouring a drink I didn’t even want sometimes. What’s happening? What’s that?”
  — on realizing she was losing control

• “The more anxiety I felt, the more I chastised myself for feeling it. I thought, ‘I shouldn’t feel this way.’”
  — on how shame compounded her emotional struggle

• “I wasn’t broken. My pattern was broken. And that can be changed.”
  — on hope for transformation

• “What if I started with my relationship with drinking? What if I got that under control?”
  — on choosing her first step toward healing

• “I was locking myself in a prison, holding the key the whole time.”
  — on how her nightly wine ritual became emotional captivity

• “You can’t fail unless you quit trying. A slip doesn’t have to become a slide.”
  — on grace in the journey

• “He didn’t want to take it away. He wanted to partner with me.”
  — on how she invited God into her sobriety