What if it happens, but...?
You have a dream. What if it actually happens? But there's one caveat...
My wife asked me a question this morning that really hit me hard. If I’m honest, it made my heart drop a bit. Not because it was a bad question, but because it was the right question. And the right questions are sometimes the hardest for us to hear.
I think it’s a question I need to ask you, too, because it could reveal what’s actually going on inside of you, and even expose if something has become unhealthy in your life.
This all started with an email alert I got sent this morning. The alert has to do with the dream my wife and I have of starting a retreat center and hosting weekends based on the four steps that helped me find freedom from alcohol — steps that can be applied to all sorts of struggles in life. (You can read more here.) We’ve picked out a couple areas, and I’ve plugged the parameters into realtor.com. Whenever a home or property becomes available, I get a notification.
On some levels, this is great. While we are nowhere close to being able to purchase any of the properties that get sent to me, I the alerts as a research tool, a reminder, and an inspiration. Someday, Jon. Someday. Don’t forget what God has put inside you.
But this morning, after I looked at one property, I got a little discouraged. “Why isn’t this happening? It just seems so big. Are we off?”
So I voiced all that to my wife. I really want this to happen. I know it’s something God has given us as a dream, passion, and desire. He’s confirmed that. But I just don’t see how it’s going to happen. There are so many things that would have to happen. In reality, it seems impossible.
That’s when she hit me with the question: “I think it’s going to happen, but what if it doesn’t happen for 20 years?”
I stuttered a bit. “Twenty years!?” I thought. “Come on!”
She was right, though. What if it doesn’t happen for 20 years? Then what? Is God still good? Is the desire still from him? Will I still give him my all? Will I still worship him? Will I still be faithful?
Then I opened up my morning devotional and it all made sense. In the September 11 entry for “New Morning Mercies,” author Paul David Tripp dismantles the idea that we are entitled to our dreams—even dreams that are good and from God. Here’s what he says:
Here’s what happens: it’s not just that you have a dream, but that your heart gets captured by your dream. It becomes your definition of “life.” You no longer hold your dream with open hands. What was once a desire has morphed into a demand, and it won’t be long before you view that demand as a need. Theis thing that you once wished that you had becomes your nonnegotiable, the thing that you are unwilling to live without. Soon you’re unhappy, not because life has been hard or God has been unfaithful, but because this thing that is effectively and functionally ruling your heart lies beyond your grasp. You are despondent and discouraged. You envy people who seem to have captured their dreams. You wonder why you’ve been singled out. You wonder why God has forgotten you. Dream? Yes, but when your dream becomes a ruling thing, it wreaks havoc on your spiritual life.
Friend, do you have a dream? A God-given one, even? But is it delayed? Does it seem to have gotten stuck in-between heaven and earth? If so, has it become something that has gone from good and right to an idol? Is it ruling you?
We can make an idol out of anything, even God-given dreams.
I was reminded of that yesterday while re-reading the story of Gideon. After his group of 300 men defeats the entire Midianite army, Judges 7 says that he builds an object to memorialize the victory. What do the people of Israel end up doing? They eventually worship it! the Bible actually says they “whored after it.” Wow. What was meant to point them to God became their god.
What is meant to point us to God can easily become our god.
We do that, too. What is meant to point us to God can easily become our God.
The dream that’s from God that’s meant to point us to him ends up consuming us. We worship it instead of the one who gave it to us. What a mess. What a twisted way to live. And yet we’re so prone to it.
How do we know if that’s become the case in our own lives? I think we have to ask ourselves the question my wife asked me this morning: What if it (whatever “it” is) doesn’t happen for 20 years? Is God still good? Will you still honor him? Will you still serve him?
Ask yourself those questions today. And if you’re not proud of the answers, then it’s time to reorganize your priorities.
(Pic: My buddy, Tommy, looking out over the Alaskan landscape before a fishing trip we took a few years back.)
Ugh, yes… this is a hard-hitter, for sure! (Good on your —very wise— wife!)
I’ve been waiting on the fulfillment of a word from God for 19 years, already, and it’s been SUCH a hard thing to continue to be patient… to trust. I’ve questioned, I’ve prayed (okay, maybe even begged! 🤦🏻♀️), and God has been gracious to give me confirmations that what I heard was from Him and that it will still come to pass. Yet, He also keeps reminding me that His timing is perfect. I just need to relax and keep on seeking Him.
If you’ve not yet heard of it, Mariel Villarreal has a great new book out called, “Prophetic Promises”. I highly recommend it. I’ve been following her on IG for years, and she’s genuine.
Ah, is the Lord answered all my prayers I'd be on my third wife! Seriously I think "confident waiting" is one of the hardest things about our faith. I was saved in jail enroute to prison. I only did four years but waiting for the next parole date toughened me for waiting. I do youth/prison/camp/church ministry [since 1977 - yes, I'm older than dirt. Some inmates I work with are doing life without....one brother I know has been locked up since 1973 and, barring a governors pardon will never see the street. He knows something about waiting. In youth ministry I remind teens and young adults of First Jack 1.8 "ti's better to be single wishing you were married than to be married wishing you were single."